Reports are reaching JackNews Corp that a reknowned Cocaine user has been shamefully exposed as a Super-model. The well known Cocaine snorter Kate Moss was snapped wantonly parading the catwalks at this years Milan, Paris, New York and London Fashion Weeks in a brazen attempt to peddle the heinous "haute couture" creations on behalf of evil Fashion Dealers such as Kunt Lagerfuck, Stella McCuntney, Yves St Laurwank, Vivienne Wankwood and Jean Paul Cuntier. It's long been suspected that many famous narcotics consumers have had shady links with this evil sub world, especially after allegedly former Cocaine uber-user Naomi Campbell was also exposed as a collaborative pawn in the evil doings of the "fashion industry".
It is now believed that there are many other suspected famous drug dependent superstars who will soon be exposed as peddlers of Fashion Filth, hitting at the very core of people used to buying clothes from M&S and Matalan, using their superstardom and innocent Class A drug habits to be part of an industry undermining every decent persons sense of colour co-ordination, flair and ability to wear clothes appropriate to the occasion at a sensible price. Reports indicate that many Dealers will now drop Kate Moss as a symbol of their products in order to distance themselves from being linked with "haute couture", and to re-establish their links to their core customers of kids and teenagers hanging around street corners, dressed by parents in cheap tat, and self absorbed media knobbers, journalists and middle managers still sucking corporate cock as they climb the greasy pole to success
In a late twist it also appears that single mother and snorter supreme, Kate has also been romantically involved with another famous drug user, fellow D-List snorter and needle-surfer Pete Doherty. It is alleged that he has links with the Music Industry, a reknowned bolthole itself for high profile drug users.
In the opinion of JackNews Corp, Pete Doherty may be a lot of things, but musician. Nah. No fucking way could anyone confuse him with being that.
Later, CharlieJack
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