Men and Women.......

I don't normally do Monday posts as the weekend is never that interesting, however a good 1-0 away win for the Mighty Blues at Middlesbrough warmed things up after a top night in Old Pub on Friday (New Pub still hasn't worked out what the fuck it needs to get the real locals in) and a semi-decent game of golf yesterday capped off a nice relaxing weekend. Told you it was dull but I like dull...dull is good...dull means no nasty surprises.

Anyway, my thanks to Private Godfrey for this - its probably done the rounds but I haven't seen it before.

How to make a woman happy?

It's really not difficult... To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be :
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynaecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organiser
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate

All this WITHOUT forgetting to:
44. give her compliments regularly
45. love shopping
46. be honest
47. be very rich
48. not stress her out
49. not look at other girls

And at the same time you MUST also:
50. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

It is VERY important to:
53. Never to forget: * birthdays* anniversaries* arrangements she makes

How to make man happy? :

1. Shag him
2. Leave him in peace

I did think of some others that make a man happy such as "don't ask for a cuddle after a shag" or don't ask him for some of his chips. I'm sure there are probably more....

Later, GrocerJack