Miserable bastard……

The mysterious Pen fairy is now plaguing me at work. When I want a pen I go to the pen pot on my desk…and there’s fuck all there. Perhaps there’s a national pen shortage I’m not aware of and therefore people are hoarding them with a view to selling them on eBay at enormous profits.

So, why am I miserable? Because a few pens have gone missing? Because I’m skint after the real Christmas cost is hitting home and the old bank account is looking very……sparse? Because The Mysterious M is on holiday and I can’t avoid receiving crap work from The Sandman? Because I live in a work world that is an utterly fucked collage of complete bollocks?

Nope – its because some Swedish cunt of a referee cost my beloved Chelsea a victory against Barca-fucking-lona last night. We lost to Newcastle in the FA Cup on Sunday – fine – I’ll take a fair defeat like a man, or at least as best a footie fan can, which means there’s always a whinge. But when some self-preening, photo happy, attention seeking, Napoleonic mannered fuckwit makes totally shite decisions like sending off Didier Drogba in the second half of a pulsating match then I get annoyed. Annoyed doesn’t cover it…red descended mist is more like 15 coats of red gloss over my eyes.....I am fucking furious.

Livid…..

Murderous…..

Boiling....

Raging….

The decision was scandalous because Drogba was going for a 50-50 ball with the goalkeeper. Drogba got the ball first but he and the goalkeeper collided each collapsing under the combined momentum of their efforts to get the ball. Cue Anders Frisk Prick, running over to brandish a second yellow card at Drogba, despite the first one being dished out for another innocuous challenge. I’m sure the fact that opposing coach Frank “Grolly Gobber” Rijkaard paid the ref a little “hospitality” visit at half time had nothing to do with it. He’s a striker for fucks sake – it’s his job to challenge for the ball. In the English premiership both challenges would have been dealt with by a ticking off from the ref AT MOST! But in the world of Euro-Ballet-Pansy-Gay-Amateur Dramatics football the goalkeeper goes down in a similar vein to Willem Dafoe in Platoon. Blimey the only thing missing was Barbers Adagio for Strings being played over the PA in The Nou Camp stadium. The balance of the game was changed after that, and despite leading 1-0, we were battered by them as they took full advantage of the numerical imbalance of 11 versus 10. Inevitably they equalized, and just as inevitably they scored to lead 2-1 and for 25 minutes they rained in attack after attack. It’s a credit to The Mighty Blues that we kept the score at 2-1. And in the cold light of day it’s a good result, because we have the away goal, and a return leg at Stamford bridge in which a 1-0 win will see us through. But the sting is that the magnificent Drogba will be suspended for that game, and we have no-one left who can score goals. It’s going to be tough, but if Frisk is the referee for the return game then I would suggest he gets a police escort in and out of the UK, let alone Stanford Bridge. Cunt is not a word I use often, but in this case it’s the ONLY word that can be used to describe him

Oh, and one last thing. Didier Drogba was very upset at the decision, understandably and for those who don’t know – he’s black. As he left the pitch he was subject to the usual Spanish Fuckwit Racist Bigot Shitnecks monkey chants. This despite the fact that 3 or 4 Barcelona players are black. So they’re fucking thick as well.

And what have UEFA said about this………..yeah….. Fuck All. So they’re cunts as well.

Spain has a long way to go to reach the level of civilisation that we enjoy. I am not saying we don’t have racists. But I can’t recall ever having heard a racist comment at Chelsea for many many years.

Not happy. And not apologising to anybody for this rant. Its cathartic.

Later, GrocerJack.