My my, the posts are getting a bit infrequent, but hey, it's because I'm doing other things like...errr.........hmmmmm......well stuff!
In the past I have written vaguely about the injustice of health and the genetic package left to me.
You know...... the lovely little pre-disposition to high blood pressure and high cholesterol that has now come to fruition despite trying to live a balanced healthy lifestyle. Well I thought I'd write a few lines on how the changes have taken and what, if any difference they've made.Well I kept to my word and instigated a programme of exercise designed to reduce my weight and increase my fitness levels. I didn't set any target dates, rather I set a target weight and have logged all the exercise details on spreadsheets to track progress. I also decided that a slow sustained exercise programme gradually building up strength and stamina would be the best way rather than trying to do too much too soon. I also decided that rather than get pulled in by the usual exercise obsession that envelopes a lot of people I would cap any exercise period at an hour per day maximum. The only exceptions to this would be when out on the real bike on a nice day.
So I chose a light gym programme of resistance exercises, along with swimming and cycling as the cornerstones of the move back to fitness. The first thing was to start swimming again. Swimming is one of the few things I consider myself to be proficient at. Back in October I slowly re-introduced myself to the pool and started at 22 lengths. At 25m per length that's 550m Despite neck and shoulder problems from my dalliance with Monsieur Fuckwit that has now risen to 70 lengths, which works out at 1750m. I've even calculated the number of calories burnt per length. On the gym front, this was going well until they either lost, or someone stole my record card. Both seem improbable to me, but hey, I have a new card which will remain with me from now on. As for the cycling...well it is on an exercise bike until the weather and additional evening light kicks in, but that has gone from 15 minutes on a low resistance setting to 45 minutes on a 'fat burn' programme which means I cover about 16.5km per session and burn around 650 calories.
And the how has this affected my weight? I don't have any scales but the fact that I'm on the last belt notch tells me something is happening. My watch now slides up and down my arm, and when swimming I have to put my wedding ring in the holdall as it has started to fall off with each stroke.
One mystery though.........why can't I lose anything from the gut area? Why doesn't the body burn and lose the fat evenly all over? My waist size has dropped but the gut remains firmly in position. At best it's only lost a bit of its size. Surely that can't be genetic as well. Surely the laws of burning more calories than eating has to kick in on that at some point?
Otherwise, whats the fucking point?
Some Friday jokes and a half arsed promised to write a bit more next week.
A man walks into a library and says 'Have you got any books on suicide?'
The librarian replies 'Fuck off , you won't bring it back'
A woman walks into a library and just before she speaks
The librarian says' Fuck off, the supermarkets over the road'
A Scouser walks into a library and says 'I want to read a book'
The librarian replies 'Are you sure? There's a whore round the corner giving free blow jobs'
The Scouser replies 'Whoa, Are you joking?'
The librarian replies 'Well you fucking started it'
I walked into library the other day and before I could speak the librarian cut the bottom 3 inches of my trousers off and put them on a shelf.
I thought 'Fuck me, that's a turn up for the books'
Later, GJ
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