It's simple

I like a moan, in fact I like it a lot. It keeps me happy. But sometimes it does my head in. Especially those who's life is a constant moan. And they want tgo tell you about it all the time. It's the cornerstone of their conversation. i'm a moaning knobber, but these people have PHDs in Moaning. Doctor Fuckwits, all of them. 


Later Mugs GJ

Gout. Why?

3 weeks and no gout and then today I wake up and can't walk. Well I can but I'm hobbling. Which of course means I look like a knob. Or a lead swinger. Maybe I need a plaster cast to get any sympathy. Either way the grumpometer is now at 7 on the scale of 10. 


Aaah, the grumpometer I hear you ask. This is a new high tech method of measuring grumpiness. Ratings of 1-3 are mere tetchiness. 4-6 is sarcastic mumbling, 7-9 is wishing the world would just fuck the fuck off and moody silence. 10 then brings in the Angerometer scale where ranting, shouting and violence to inanimate objects kicks in. This scale is exponential and therefore has decimal points from 0.1 to 10. I have never reached 20 but all I'm saying is that probably involves custodial sentences and psychiatric treatment in Europe. Maybe in the US it might mean 20 years in a small apartment on Death Row. 


But for now, the gout means its just a miserable day of pain.  Good job we still have the light and it's not raining....oh hang on....


Later Mugs, GJ